The Bells of Ousley was one of the waterside hostelries visited by the original Men in a Boat and because they had got soaked during their journey, the crew decided to take shelter in this establishment at eleven o’clock in the morning.
In the book it is described it is said to be situated on A shady road, dotted here and there with dainty little cottages, runs by the bank up to the "Bells of Ouseley," a picturesque inn, as most up- river inns are, and a place where a very good glass of ale may be drunk. Now let’s examine what is like today. The road on which it lies is on the main road from Staines to Windsor, the old pub has been mostly knocked down and is now part of the Harvester Chain of Inns and Pubs.
The pub did serve up some excellent ales and were served by a really happy bunny of a bar maid called Julie or Julie the Pierced , for she had a small stud in her cheek and a tongue stud which the First Mate noticed. The Captain asked the First mate “What’s she got her tongue pierced for then? “Got to be something sexual I reckon”, he replied.
The Captain told Julie that “She looked like the actress Samantha Janus, a bit” and she asked “Who’s that then?”. Billy interrupted and said “You know, she’s in East Enders” “Not that Dot Cotton, I hope” said Julie”.”No she’s playing Dot’s mum”, Billy laughingly replied. To add to the jollity of the moment, the Captain took off his soaking wet coat to reveal that he was wearing only a thermal vest and a pair of Y-fronts.”Sorry “he said “I got dressed in such a hurry this morning and Billy said” He’s losing his marbles and we’ve only brought him out of the old folks home for the day, is there a special place where he can sit then?” The Captain smiled and said ”Yes Billy”, what about sitting me on Julie’s knee? “.The Cabin Boy asked “How did the pub get it’s name” but none of the bar staff or the manger knew the answer.We looked on all the walls in the entire pub but could find no explanations as to the pub name”.
A guy, a typical looking rambler, ambled up to the bar and said “Perhaps I can help you there.”There was this abbey up in Osney near Oxford and the monks decided to move the bells from the abbey to London and when the boat got here it sank it was just down there in the River.
The crew thanked Julie for being such a good sport ,the rain had stopped and headed up river towards Datchet.
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