179. Old rock stars

Sat outside a pub on our travels between Kingston and Staines, there was sat a gang of four old boys who were reminiscing about the past and heard them mention, the Isle of Wight, Liverpool and Wandsworth so we naturally assumed jails, and that these four guys were old lags who had been guests of Her Majesty’s prisons more commonly referred to as crowbar hotels. How wrong can you be, they had all played together in a band in the 60’s and 70’s called the Rhythm Pigs. The Captain told these blokes that he had played in a 60’s style of band and that he could guess who played what. He said that “Ted  the guy with the beard and hat, was the lead guitarist ,Bob, the big old fat boy was the drummer, the guy with the  Teddy Boy hair cut ,Tony,  was the rhythm guitarist and singer and the quite guy, Barry   was the bass player.”

The Captain must have been physic or in his case the complete reverse. He got all roles wrong for in fact they had been part of a jazz band and Ted was a sax player, Bob was a piano player, Tony was a banjo player and Barry was a trumpeter.”I suppose the dog played guitar didn’t he” said the Captain.”Don’t be silly “said Ted, “He can’t read music, he’s only got eight fingers and besides that he would only slobber on the fret board.” With his tail between his legs, the Captain bade them “Goodbye until the next time” and heard one of them say “What a wanker ”,the Captain quickly turned around and said “Well then lads we all make  mistakes and  in all your cases , if your dads had been a wanker  , you lot  would have never have been born.”Barry pitched in and added “Well in our case old son, we have an excuse but you haven’t, now get off before someone gets hurt”, “Like giving your dog a good kickin’ “retorted the Captain. This time the Captain failed to add more insult to injury and, legged it quickly to join the rest of the crew.