When boating with such an experienced Captain as ours you can of course expect him to hit obstacles which suddenly jump out of the wood work , concrete and galvanised metalwork.
These sneaky creatures will take you by surprise often because when you are heading straight for them they remain stubborn and fail to get out of your way. The alert Captain is well aware of their treachery and will have no option but to bow to their superiorly and plough straight into them at no expense concerning damage to his beloved vessel. This is where a Captain may use a strong language like, serves the fucker right, waste the mother fucker and that bastard had it coming to it any way. These expletives are also often followed by remorseful statements like it could have been worse, we may have killed some innocent bystander, sunk our ship or even worse one of the crew may have sustained a scratch or two. A Captain under these circumstances is in no way, shape or form to blame and any mention of never turn the engine off when the boat is in motion, will result in a severe reprimand and the sulking of the aforesaid for several hours and the accuser being left with a string of unpleasant duties such as licking the toilet bowl clean and removing pubic hair from blocked waste pipes. And dependent upon the severity of your offence against the Captain., you may forced to steer the boat yourself for several hours whilst enduring an ear blasting every minute for things that you have done wrong while under the supervision of a much superior being such as the captain The only fool that the Captain suffers is himself.
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