101. Another beard

Having already met a bearded person, it was a real bonus to meet another while walking trying to find another eatery for our supper.

Taking a short cut through the back streets of Wallingford, Phil and Jimmy spotted another bearded personage named Dan. Sailor Dan, a sweaty sock had been born in Dundee and had gone away to sea as a young man. He retired to Abingdon some 20 years previously .Dan was using a walking stick and was therefore no match for our intrepid  pair, who  homed  in on the disabled old man.

Having learnt from previous experience , Jimmy quickly engaged the old boy in conversation, while Phil in his favourite position snook up from the rear and without even thinking about his personal safety even though his prey was fully armed with a working walking stick, quickly popped the question “Have you anything living in that beard?”.As quick as a whistle Dan retorted “I don’t think so but last week in the mirror I did see a couple of pairs of hands poking out of it”.

The Captain asked Dan, “Why did you grow a beard then”? “Well” said Dan “Its the single most manly, and great thing a man can do. To have a beard is to be a true man. If you have a beard, you can show it off proudly, and enjoy the satisfaction of the envy in the eyes of people around you who don't have beards such as you two. If you don't have a beard, grow one. If you can’t grow one and I assume that you and your mate are past the age of puberty, go and get a sex change.

We talked for several more minutes and bid Dan farewell. As we did Dan shouted “Watch out there’s plenty more beards about”. Phil laughed and said “Your missus got one then?”