As we moved towards Boveney, there is a funny looking church because it looks more like a granary or another type of farm building.
Another interesting fact about this church is that it has been built on a remote part of the Thames and lies some distance from the actual village of Boveney .Due to its remoteness is probably why it has been used in many TV series such as Inspector Morse and Robin Hood Prince of Thieves.
When talking to a local we found out that about 6 or 7 years ago the church was declared redundant to the needs of the Church of England and it was given to the Friends of the Friendless Churches whose mission is to repair and conserve churches for sinners like the crew of the Lorna II.
Major repair works have recently been carried out on the tower to try to restore the church and like a lot of church projects , they are always trying to raise funds and now due to even more cut backs by the government the chances of such old, historic buildings getting funding is becoming more and more remote.
Leaving the church behind, the Captain looked back and said “ A great place to bring girlfriends back after a Saturday night dance for a quick bit of you know what”, “More like a couple of sheep I reckon, but don’t forget to wear your wellies “ echoed “The Cabin Boy.
The First Mate made his contribution by saying, I reckon during this voyage we must have touched on sheep several times , I don’t know why but us guys find sheep of interest, perhaps you can give us your ideas on it Billy?”.
“Its quite a difficult question, but in my opinion ,they are of interest from humanitarian, religious, and of course, sexual aspects. You see there was this guy called Richard Whately who was some Oxford Don, who later became the Archbishop of Dublin,who was renowned for his logic and rhetoric, and because of these two personal qualities he was a great talker who liked to provoke interesting discussions. Well one of his thought provoking sayings was “Men are like sheep, of which a flock is more easily driven than a single one”. And, then there was that Greek guy Alexander the Great who came up with “I am not afraid of an army of lions led by a sheep; I am afraid of an army of sheep led by a lion.”.Throughout history, there had been many phrases or sayings about men which express the many foibles of human behavior.
Moving onto the religious elements of sheep next, most of the quotes in the Bible such as” Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ravaging wolves.”, which really means a wolf is always wolf, which I suppose is just common sense. But the most famous one I reckon is from Roman’s I think which says “For the sake we are killed all day long; we are accounted as sheep to the slaughter.” The First Mate asked “What exactly does that mean then Billy?”Billy replied,”Well it means that if we are to really have any impact on the world, and become devout Christians, we are to die for our human desires such as fame, success, wealth and sex, and really pay attention to what really matters to God”. The First Mate mocked “Well what really matters to your imaginary friend, God then Billy.” Simple things Phil, like sharing the Gospel, speaking out against sin,, and speaking up for righteousness, no matter what the consequences”.
The Captain called the crew to order.”Now then lads ,let’s forget that God Squad stuff and talk about something more close to hand like those sheep in that meadow over there”.”Oh, I suppose I should complete my little chat about sheep and sex then “.” Go on then Billy give us your deliberations “.” No need to really, its already been done before. There was this American professor called Kinsey who ran a research project in the late 1940’s on human sexuality and produced some statistic that stated that over 40% of farm boys had dabbled about with bestiality”.”And Billy” said the Captain “There’s always that the American Novelist Mark Twain who quoted “There’s lies, damned lies and statistics”.”Wrong once “; pronounced the First Mate ,”It was Benjamin Disraeli”.”Christ First Mate”, what’s with you and that guy Disraeli, for that’s the second or third time that his name has come up during this trip”.
The First Mate pitched into the conversation with “ I say Billy “ How are your friends Baaaab, Baabaara and , Baabasil” ,the Captain added and “Don’t forget your other mates Lambert, Lambchop and Dolly the Clone”.
“OK, as we are all now in joke mode gentlemen, tell us your best sheep joke, you go first then First Mate “ .The First Mate said “What do you call four sheep tied to a post in Wales?...... a leisure centre”.
“Billy you’re next.” The Cabin Boy replied, “I’m not very good at telling jokes but I’ll try “What d’ya call a guy with a hundred girlfriends… a shepherd”
“Well done Billy, very good for you, and Captain, it’s your turn next”.”Well it’s a bit rude for this time of day and seeing that we haven’t even had a drink yet but how about “What do you call a sheep without any head or legs…the world’s largest tampon”.
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